Porter Productions Proudly Presents: Sampson Rowling by Ryan Porter

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About the Author

    This is the part of the web page in which it describes its author.  

    Now that most of you understand what About the Author means, I will attempt to describe him in the best way that I can.  Sampson Rowling is a man of many talents.  Few of them can be seen or understood by the populous as a whole, but all of them can be made fun of on some level.  He enjoys a good joke, one that doesn't make the face turn red.  He is a man of simple needs like most, food, T.V., and the occasional video game.  
  Born in a region which no one knows where it is or why its there, he has crawled his way through the rankings of the human race to become what he is today....and he is still trying to figure out exactly what that is.  Sampson writes this page in which topics are brought up about things important to him and anyone who cares.  These topics are all offensive, simply because he understands the fact that everything will offend someone somewhere sometime.  Which is of course the motto he lives by.  Though Sampson does not like to be the cause of a ruckus, he simply likes to be heard.  Those who listen may or may not understand, but all in all they did listen and that is what is important to him.
        Why should we care?
    We shouldn't really.  He doesn't like to boast about what he does or why, but just to do it.  He understands that many people have a goal in what they do and respects that.  But when did it come to the point where we have to do something just so it will please others or ourselves?  Why can't something just be?  That is why he has created the page.  Simply to exist and nothing more.  He may come off as ignorant or silly, but that is the exact reason he is here.  To prove to man that something can be nothing if anything can be something.  That may boil your noodle or simply make you wonder if that even makes logical sense.  But it is in the end, what you make of it, even if it’s just a paper airplane that doesn’t fly.

        What should we do about it?
Sampson doesn't really understand why he wrote the section "what should we do about it" in his biography.  So he has decided to skip it entirely, but he will leave it here as a reminder of his lack of attention to what he does.  Let that be a lesson to himself...

        Is Sampson real?
Sampson is a figment of my imagination.  Which in turn makes him real, to me.  That is all that really matters essentially.  I am Sampson Rowling.  I am who and what he decides to be and do.  Combining first and third person thoughts is too destructive to continue.
        Will Sampson ever write a comprehensive article?
Sampson has decided to leave this up to the reader.  He thinks everything has some comprehensive value to it.  Even if he does see Lucifer in his soup.    

So, now that you understand what you've gotten yourself into there are a few questions you have to ask yourself.
1. Do I read on and continue this insanity?
2. Do I E-Mail him in hopes of purchasing the Lego films for 8$ plus shipping and handling?
3. Do I save this site to my favorites to keep it with me always like that fuzz between my toes that just won't go away?
4. Are you still there?
5. Don't leave.
6. What ever happened to South America?


The above picture is from the critically acclaimed movie The Amazing Lego Adventure 2: Legos in America.

Site brought to you by Ryan Porter E-Mail me at acefondu@hotmail.com